Conflict in relationships are unavoidable. But by setting up the relationship for success, you can win every time. These relationship tips will show you how to win every conflict. It begins by creating patterns.
First Relationship Tip
The first relationship tip is creating patterns that are healthy and sustainable. What that looks like is there are certain ground rules. I talk to people that I work with about how to fighting fair.
Does it mean that one person always wins and one person always loses? No the relationship always wins.
We are looking to creating patterns that are sustainable which is the next relationship tip. So there are certain ground rules that you respect and maintain because of the relationship. And these are rules you have both agreed upon.
More Relationship Tips
For example, some of the ground rules can be:
- We’re not going to physically throw anything at each other no matter how heated things get.
- We are not going to curse at each other, resort to name calling, or use derogatory language no matter how heated it gets.
- We are not going to weaponized anything that is being said during the discussion; what is discussed here, stays here.
By establishing these tips, your relationship will win in every conflict because what you are deciding are what the boundaries will be in the conversation before the conflict occurs. These boundaries have been establish with your partner before the disagreement. Therefore when you you do have a conflict or you’re discussing areas where you don’t see eye to eye, you are able to revisit those things in a way that is healthy.
Final Relationship Tip
The final relationship tip maybe having an agreed upon time limit for certain conversations. So we may agree to talk for a maximum of 15 minutes. Because when we go beyond that we start saying a lot of extra things that we really don’t mean or that we may regret.
Does that mean you will always maintain the time limit? No, because we’re human and life happens.
But what that does mean is that when you do have a conversation and we get to the end of the 15 minutes but need more time because we’re actually just getting to the heart of the matter, you can ask your partner if it is okay to have a little bit more time. Instead of continuing the conversation and the other person is loosing focus.
Now, you are giving your partner the opportunity and space to agree to spend more time on the matter. By renegotiating together to spend an extra 5 or 10 minutes it creates safety and healthy patterns between you and your partner.
For more tips tailored to your specific relationship books a relationship session today.